Now that I am going through my second pregnancy almost four years later than my first, there is so much I have realised this time round that I wish I had known the first, so I thought I would share for all those first time mummas. You don’t have to take on anything I say but I always loved to read other mums experiences when pregnant so I do hope you get something from my journey.
The first thing is that no pregnancy is the same!
When I first found out I was pregnant with Finn I was quite unwell with anaemia (three blood transfusions) and going through a number of tests to find out what was wrong with me. I had never really been sick at all my whole life, apart from the normal cough/colds so it was unusual for me to be as unwell as I was and then to later find out I was pregnant as well. I was actually in the waiting room at the hospital for a CT scan when they asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant. I said that I didn’t think anyone could be 100% sure that they were not pregnant but I highly doubted it. They decided to do a test anyway (which was not a routine thing I found out) and when I arrived in to the room for the CT scan I was surrounded by a group of lovely ladies looking rather compassionate. They sat me down before telling me that I was indeed pregnant and basically said that it was lucky I had found out prior to going in to the CT scanner as the radiation would have had adverse affects on the baby (for this point, I knew Finn was a sign and a blessing straight away!)
Feeling overwhelmed and in shock I bawled my eyes out for a good 10 minutes before heading back out to the waiting room to my grandma who was waiting for me. She looked up and said “that was quick” and when I told her what was going on she couldn’t believe it either, mainly because we had been joking about it prior to me going in to the room like “yeah right!”. I remember calling Chance on the way home and him asking how the scan went. As soon as I said I couldn’t have it, he asked if I was pregnant like he knew all along. I bawled again. Surprisingly, he sounded excited rather than shocked and wanted to see me immediately. He was so happy about it that it made it a lot easier for me to adjust.
When I went for my first appointment I was already 7-8 weeks pregnant and had not had any symptoms. Apart from being exceptionally tired which was put down to the anaemia, I would never have guessed I was pregnant. My periods were all out of wack anyway and I did not receive one bout of morning sickness the entire pregnancy. I was immediately assigned a midwife and started my folic acid & prenatal vitamins.
Being just 23 at the time, I look back now and think about how I really didn’t know what was going on. I trusted my doctors and midwife of course but I feel like I did things I would not have done if I had have more time to research and think about it. In the early stages of my pregnancy I had to take antibiotics twice to treat BV-a bacterial infection. Even at the time I hated taking antibiotics in pregnancy but was afraid that the infection would harm the baby more. I was also on iron tablets to get it back up to normal levels but the pregnancy seemed to make my prior health issues disappear and my iron improved immensely. After I passed the 12 week stage, the doctors recommended I get a flu shot to protect myself from the flu and any harm to the baby. I still don’t know why I got it. I had never even had the flu shot up until then and don’t have it now but I was so scared of something happening to my baby that I listened to the doctors. I do know that a heck of a lot of pregnant mums are given the flu shot and apparently it is safe, but I just don’t think it was a decision I would have made if I was a bit wiser. From there things started to smooth out and my pregnancy seemed to be relatively easy. I never took anything else apart from a panadol when I was in hospital with some pain.
I was absolutely over the top about what I should be avoiding, and remember I lost it when I realised a pasta sauce I ate had blue cheese in even though it was fully cooked (ha!). I googled absolutely everything and drove myself insane to the point where I was suffering OCD (which continued after Finn was born too). I was continuously worried that something would harm my baby and I think because it was unplanned and I was so unwell when I first conceived that I was not being easy on myself at all. In terms of nutrition, I was pretty healthy throughout the pregnancy and never ate more food than necessary nor did I ever restrict myself. I actually went off chocolate which was the biggest positive because I was quite the addict and instead I craved things like oranges! I only put on 10kg the entire pregnancy and my baby bump was pretty tiny even at full-term, however Finn was always measuring perfectly the whole way through.
Fast forward to 32 weeks and my pregnancy had been pretty great until I started getting extremely itchy feet. Of course I jumped on google and found out about cholestasis. A relatively rare condition during pregnancy where your liver basically doesn’t produce bile how it is supposed too. The symptoms are extreme itchiness and it is intolerable. I remember waking in the middle of the night and not being able to sleep for hours until I got some relief. I went to the hospital and spoke to the doctor about it who said it was probably just dermatitis. I insisted she test me for cholestasis (I seriously couldn’t believe she wasn’t going too) and the results came back positive. From that moment and for the next five weeks my pregnancy became high risk and I was in the hospital every week for monitoring. Apparently the risk of stillbirth is higher with cholestasis so they aim to induce you between 35-38weeks. Because my levels were pretty good I lasted until I was induced at 37 weeks.
My induction started at 9am on September 27, 2012 and it wasn’t until 5pm that my waters broke and labour really started. After a full on yet short relatively labour, Finn arrived at 7.17pm. We actually had a touch and go moment during my labour when his breathing started to slow due to getting stuck and if I didn’t push him out quickly I was going to have to be rushed away for an emergency c-section. I just remember being in this bubble of pain and looking at my partner’s & my sister’s face (both in the labour room) and seeing the fright in their eyes and knowing I had to push harder to get him out, which I did (and without any interference). I was really pleased that I managed to get through my labour with just having gas. However, half an hour before Finn arrived I desperately screamed for pethidine to give me some relief but Finn arrived before it even started to work.
I can’t explain the first moment I saw him and just knew he was OK. I cried so much and I just remember saying how beautiful he was. He was absolutely perfect. He scored a 9/10 on the Apgar score after some help with his breathing and he was in my arms straight away. I felt absolutely blessed to have him and have felt that way everyday since. As he has grown up I have worried that something during my pregnancy may have affected his health. He does seem to have a bit of occasional asthma during winter but I really have to be grateful that the only time he gets sick is from when something is going around at day care. He has never been in hospital and he is incredibly bright, well-mannered and loving. His development has been spot on, and he is well-advanced in areas (thanks to his dad), however he does have some sensory things that I wonder if they may have been caused by pregnancy but I will never know and they aren’t serious enough to stress about for the rest of my life. I look at him now at almost 4 years old and just think how incredibly blessed I am to have him in my life and at how perfect he is after I stressed over him for so long in my tummy. All of my prior health issues seemed to disappear during pregnancy including the anaemia, and my liver returned to normal straight away (so cholestasis really is just pregnancy related for me!).
This time round has been a totally different experience.
Because we had started talking about another baby, I had already started taking my folic acid early. I don’t think we expected just how quickly it was going to happen because within a month we were already pregnant. I was also in much better health this time round, with my iron levels and everything how they should be.
From five weeks, morning sickness came at full force, which is why everyone thought I was having a girl because I never experience it with Finn. I was sick from morning until the evening and struggled to get any food down. I also had strange cravings for things like cream donuts, which was totally the opposite to what I wanted when pregnant with Finn. The morning sickness lasted until after 12 weeks and at times it was unbearable. Having to work long days made it way harder and although the doctor offered me anti-nauseous medication, I decided against taking anything and instead tried natural alternatives like ginger and dry food (which didn’t really work).
After the morning sickness and up until now my pregnancy has been pretty smooth sailing apart from the tiredness and growing pains. Baby is extremely active and healthy and all I have had to take during my pregnancy is my pre-natal vitamin & some extra iron to get my levels up to normal. No antibiotics, no flu shots and nothing else. I did feel like I was getting a UTI or possibly BV again and was stressing I would have to take antibiotics but with drinking lots of water & cranberry juice I have managed to keep it at bay.
I don’t know how the remaining of the pregnancy will go as there is an 80% chance I will get cholestasis back this time but so far I have not had any symptoms. If it does come back it means I will be induced again and although that is inevitable I am going to try my best for as natural as possible this time around again and have even asked for a birthing pool for the early parts of labour, which I am really excited about.
This time round I have also stressed less about food and have just made sure I prepare everything myself but have had soft cheese on the odd occasion (fresh) and even had some aoili in a burger! eek. I still stress about chemicals sometimes but I know some things are just out of my control. I also use a lot more natural cleaning products around the home these days because as I have become older (and wiser) I have become a bit more conscious of my environment. I have however, eaten worse this time around than the first as I have had huge sweet cravings but I have tried to maintain healthy habits in my other meal choices. I have also been more accepting of the weight gain and embraced my bigger bump and curves, although the pregnancy waddle has come on a lot quicker than I though it would 😉
When I look at both my pregnancies, I know that I have been incredibly lucky to have it pretty easy to both conceive and maintain a smooth pregnancy apart from the cholestasis. However, I have learnt so much more this time round just knowing and trusting my body and of course with better knowledge coming from age and research. I was still pretty young with Finn and of course I did the absolute best to maintain a healthy pregnancy but I do feel I could have made things a bit easier on myself from what I have learnt now. But hey, learning has to come from somewhere right?
I don’t want anyone to feel bad about their pregnancies, nor do I want any mums blaming themselves for any decisions they made during pregnancy that they felt necessary like taking antibiotics or anything else for that matter. I am no medical professional and I know there are so many great doctors and midwifes out there guiding us to have wonderful pregnancies and births.
I just wanted to share with you what I have learnt from both my pregnancies and what I would have done differently with a bit of knowledge and trusting myself. I don’t regret anything that happened during my first pregnancy as I know at the time I was doing what I thought was absolutely necessary to maintain the health of my growing baby. I just felt I listened too much to what other people were telling me rather than myself and this time round I have learnt to trust my body more and ride the journey as naturally as possible.
I can’t wait to update you on my birth story this time around and I will be sure to post something on cholestasis for all my other mummas out there going through it as well. I have actually met two other mums who have gone through it as well so I guess it is not so rare after all!
Please feel free to ask me any questions in the comments below or share your own stories. I love to hear from other mums and dads! xoxox
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